Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Dandelion Seeds

You're never to old to wish on dandelion seeds.

A few months ago during a walk with my best friend, we stumbled across a single dandelion.  It was the beginning to my journey with dandelion seeds.  For as long as I could remember, every birthday candle, penny tossed into a wishing well, and every dandelion seed I blew were spent asking God for the same thing. (which I can't obviously say, cause that's against the rules of wishes) But this time, I finally chose to ask for something different. It kind of went like this, "I want, Lord, what you want."

I had always been a pretty big dreamer, specifically a day dreamer with huge aspirations!  I wanted to write books and music. I wanted to inspire the younger generations and change the world.  I'm not exactly sure when I gave up on dreaming, but I do remember a point in life when I considered myself dumb for dreaming.   I don't think it was a coincidence that it was around the same time I was tied down to my race against time.  It wasn't until I could finally break off those chains that I felt it was okay to dream again.   When my womens' Bible study prayed for me last year, one of their prophetic words for me was that God was going to give me dreams again, dreams I had since birth and new ones He had yet to grow in my heart.  And that's what He's been doing for me.

I really like how Stasi Eldredge said it, "When you let God's love overwhelm your fears, He replaces them with desires and dreams."  (Becoming Myself)  As I read her books, "Becoming Myself" and "Captivating" I realized that our dreams are not dumb, they are what makes us unique. They are our God-given desires for our lives.

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

I found myself a few weeks later I was with my friend again talking.  It seemed that life was turning upside down for both of us.  Doors that had seemed to open were shutting on us, and things were not going the way we planned or hoped.  We were about to end our conversation feeling a bit discouraged, when there again was one single dandelion waiting for us to wish on.  We already knew what the next step would have to be.  We may not be sure of where we're headed, but we wanted to have the courage to follow God when He did reveal our path.

And even when everything seems up in the air, don't stop dreaming,
because one day all those wishes will land exactly where God has planned.

A few days later, I went on a nine mile hike up in the canyons with some church friends.  Being out of reception it felt like the perfect place to be still and listen to God speak.  So He sent me dandelions. But not the cute normal fluffy ones.  These ones were huge and silver with spiky seeds.  At first there was one, then another, and another.  I knew exactly what He was telling me. Because I knew that deep inside I was too afraid to ask God for what I really wanted.  It's not because I didn't believe He could do it, but I didn't believe He would do it, because I feel many time undeserving.  But here I was on a nine mile hike with Him surrounded by hundreds, maybe thousands of dandelions.  Too many, I couldn't even possibly have that many wishes.  It was like He was telling me, I don't want to give you just one dandelion, all of these are for you.  You can never ask too much.

And when you think your dreams are too big or too much to ask God for,
He says, dream bigger.

Over and over again, He has brought me to full on tears, just completely overwhelmed with how much He loves me and wants me to dream.

Just this past weekend, I was with my bestfriend again, but this time in Redding visiting Bethel Church.  I was looking forward to a weekend of crazy spiritual encounters and who knows what else God would send my way.  I had a coupon for the bookstore, so there I was, searching every nook and cranny in that place for my gift from Jesus.  Just like my times at Ross, I knew it would be evident when I found the book.  And there were so many.  Books on having faith, interpreting dreams, starting a dance team at your church, etc. etc.  whatever you could think of, they had it. I kept picking up book after book, without any hope.  So in my mind, I said, I'll know I have found my book because it will have a dandelion on it.  I had searched the whole store, disappointed that I was obviously wrong again.  Maybe I wasn't so good at hearing God.  My friend called me over to check out their journal section, pulling out a single journal. This looks like you're type of journal.  I barely glanced over, and suddenly waterfalls poured from my eyes.

There it was.  The book God promised me.  Through unrelenting sobs I quietly squeaked out, "It has a dandelion."  Nothing was too much, nothing was too dumb to ask.  Here I was overcome that God loved me so much as to grant me such a petty petition.  Keep dreaming He told me.

Knowing God, I'm sure I'll continue to have more dandelion experiences, but I thought I'd share the few I encountered today.

When your dreams seem broken, maybe it's because some of them have finally taken flight.

And my favorite so far, the dandelion-covered field waiting right outside our hotel room.

He spoke to me through dandelions seeds, blowing in the wind,
On the gentlest of breezes, in the rose-colored sunsets.
And He whispered in my ear, "Darling, dream again."